Corporate Crisis! – Why 95% of women want out…
It’s easy to get lost in the daily grind, but more and more people, and these days women in particular, are feeling like something is missing in their lives. Questions begin to surface like ‘Surely there must be more to life than this?’, ‘Who am I really?’ and ‘What’s next for me!?’
In fact we can get so caught up that one day when we wake up and think where is it I’m actually headed? Why am I here? And what do I actually want from my life anyway? Suddenly the world around us doesn’t quite make sense anymore as we realise we don’t have the answers.
Usually that’s when my clients come to see me. They are searching for answers/meaning – wondering just what is my greater purpose in life?
OK, so how is my purpose different to my career?
Simply put, your purpose is the bigger picture reason you are here. It’s the thing that turns us on, lights us up and ignites the fire inside. Your higher self actually already knows what this is, and is continually trying to draw you to the path that will take you there, it’s just sometimes we get side-tracked along the way.
Higher Self – What the?
OK so still with me here? Great! Your higher self is not some mumbo jumbo term, it’s simply the best version of you. The REAL you. The untapped, unlimited, source potential that is in each and every one of us. Unfortunately this you is usually buried under layers of ‘stuff’ (technical term for all that disempowering self-talk like ‘I’m not good enough,’ ‘smart enough’, ‘pretty enough’, ‘talented enough’, or ‘I don’t know how,’ ‘I could never do that’ etc.) Hmm, sound familiar?
Why we get off track
See what happens is this…when we are little and there is no pressure to be or do something that our parents or society expects of us, you had a calling to let your natural abilities and talents shine forth. Unfortunately the time and place we were born, the culture or family we grew up in, and the things that influence us as we grow up don’t always recognise or reward the thing we are good at or are passionate about. Often we are criticised or judged for being or wanting to be or do something other than what is deemed acceptable within the context we are in so we learn to supress and condition our genius to something more acceptable, or makes us more money.
In today’s society monetary reward is highly valued and sometimes the things we love to do don’t seem to be the things that are recognised financially, so we can often get confused with what is our purpose and what is ‘the logical thing to do with my career’, based on the idea of who I think I am (self-concept); what I think I’m capable of (self-worth, belief systems);’ where I’ve come from (socio-economic background, education etc); what I should be doing (society’s/other people’s influence); how much money I can make etc.
We then adapt who we are and what we chose to do based on an idea of what we think we need to be in order to fit in to ‘the system’ and forget who we really are – the soul with infinite choices and possibilities that we were when we were born. Often the money we are eternally chasing, we end up spending on stuff that we don’t actually need to make us feel good because we’re not actually happy in the jobs we’re in and don’t have a purpose to move towards. (How many times have you found yourself earning more money, but still never having any?? Hmmm..)
Now we can do this for a while without noticing, the problem is, if we stray too far off path we end up feeling dissonance because we are not in alignment with our core truth. This can manifests as feeling restless, being tired or lacklustre, getting ill, not wanting to go to work, being miserable or disengaged when we are at work, feeling like something is missing or we are not realising our potential, feeling disillusioned with life, depression, anxiety, stress, overwhelm and a general feeling of unease/disharmony with life.
The thing that’s great about this, is that often our biggest challenges are just signs from the universe that we are not on path…if we won’t recognise it ourselves the universe simply gives us a helping hand. Think of it like a dream…you are more compelled to want to ‘wake up’ from a nightmare than you are from a normal dream. The nightmare you might be experiencing could be an accident, relationship breakdown, being sacked or feeling like your job isn’t working for you anymore or some other sort of forced ending.
Being ‘On Purpose’ on the other hand is easy to recognise – if you are living it you will feel exhilarated, inspired, passionate, excited, awake, happy to be alive!!!
What if I don’t know what my purpose is?
1. The first step is to start making a list of everything that makes you happy. Things you love to do, when all the bills are paid, that you would do whether you were asked to, paid for, expected to or not. It could be things like cooking, socialising, keeping fit, organising parties with friends, riding horses, writing, entertaining, being in nature, playing guitar, singing in the shower etc.
2. Then write a list of things you are good at, that you do naturally without even thinking about them. If you’re not sure what do people ask your advice on or tell you are good at?
These are your passions and natural genius. Pick one thing off those lists and make sure you devote some time to it this week. See how good you feel doing it. Give it a feel good factor between 1 and 10. Then next week pick another thing. Start to notice the activities that get 10’s!
By doing what makes you feel happiest, even if it’s just a little each day, you can build upon making this more and more of your life which will give you the confidence to start asking ‘how questions.’ Like how do I make what makes me happiest able to materially support me also?
3. Write down the one thing that if you died in a car crash tomorrow never having made happen would be your biggest regret in life?
4. Write down the reason you haven’t done that yet or the biggest thing stopping you from making a living AND doing what makes you happiest?
How did it feel thinking about the first two, compared to numbers 3 and 4? Was there a difference? Good. Because whether the feeling was inspiration and excitement or regret, fear or sadness, these are some of the internal guidance mechanisms you have to drive you to fulfilling your purpose…I won’t go into that too much here though.
Once you’ve done a little self-discovery the secret then is bridging the gap between how to make your vacation your vocation. And believe me it really is possible. I know I’ve been there too. I’ve learnt the secret of how to live ‘on purpose’ and make a meaningful career from something I’m great at that I love, part of which is helping women to find their own purpose and to honour that path.
Wishing you truth, love and freedom in your own journey.